The Art of Relationship Making
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Ask anyone who has gained some measure of success in their career and they
will tell you the number one skill that has served them to the highest level is
the skill in building relationships.
Donald Trump, Rosie O’ Donnell, Martha Stewart, Ellen DeGeneres all attribute
their individual success to the quality of their relationships. So what is the
art of relationship making that sets high performing leaders apart from others?
In my research for the book I am writing called, The Control Freak Revolution
I have found that people want to help other people. People also want to do
business with others who they feel they have something in common.
Here are the top 5 ways to master the art of relationship making:
- High level self awareness- do you know your personality
tendencies? Likes, dislikes and further to that your turn offs? Relationship
masters know themselves so well that they can identify how to adapt to others
based on their own inner self knowledge. Harvard Business Review February 2007
issue says that in their research leader self-awareness is the number one
determinant of success.
- High levels of love for others- do you find people
annoying? Do you even like people? If you don’t this is a major roadblock to
building great relationships. Like it or not we are a society that bases
likeability as a deciding factor in who we will cooperate with. If you love
people in general, if you have a curiosity for what makes them tick and if you
WANT to create great connections you need to have a love for people.
- Willing to ebb and flow- Are you rigid in your attitudes
and beliefs? Do you find yourself wanting to defend your position often?
Relationship mastery requires the personal willingness to move back and forth
to give and take and to create wins for others which means flexibility and
- Solution provider- Artful relationships are powerful when
the basis of the relationship is on solutions. The best scenario is where
everyone we interact with is focused on the same goal of being solution
oriented. If we are constantly presenting problems or obstacles to others they
begin to view us as too draining and will avoid us. On the other hand if you
are someone who is ALWAYS looking for the solution that benefits the other
person you will create beautiful and harmonious relationships that expand.
- Make them look like a hero- people want to feel good.
People want to be around people who make them feel good. If we are focused on
making those in our lives and at work look like heroes they will respond with
gratitude, trust and support. Recently at a huge conference a woman said to me
as I passed her, “you are fantastic”. I stopped gave her a big smile, looked
her right in the eye and said, “so are you!” and she joyfully clapped her
hands at our exchange. The truth is when we recognize the brilliance in others
they feel connected and in positive relationship to us.
The better the relationships we develop the better we feel about what we do
and the more joy we gain out of our work. Here’s to great relationships!
About the Author
Cheryl Cran, CSP President of Synthesis at Work Inc. works with organizations
in significantly increasing productivity and profitability through communication
strategies that improve employee performance, leverage team synergy and build
extraordinary leaders. Many of Synthesis at Work's clients are award winning
industry leaders. www.cherylcran.com
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Article Published/Sorted/Amended on Scopulus 2008-05-16 23:47:03 in Personal Articles